Overcoming Negative Body Image: Strategies for building Self-Acceptance

In today's episode, we're going to be talking about the important and sensitive topic of negative body image.

As a psychiatric nurse practitioner specializing in treating eating disorders, I've seen firsthand how negative body image can impact people of all ages, genders and sizes. We'll explore some of the roots of negative body image, including unrealistic media portrayals, social comparison, societal pressures, and personal experiences like bullying or trauma.

I'll also share some of my own story and how a traumatic dog bite I experienced as a child left physical and emotional scars that impacted my own body image for years.

Most importantly, we'll discuss coping strategies and a healthier approach I call "body neutrality" - accepting your body without judgment and focusing on what it can do, not just how it looks.

If you or someone you know is struggling with body image or an eating disorder, know that you're not alone and that healing is possible. I hope this episode helps provide some guidance and resources for your journey.

So let's dive into this important discussion on negative body image, its causes, and how we can cultivate a healthier relationship with our bodies and ourselves. 

00:00 Social media presents a curated view. Be mindful.

03:13 Challenge societal beauty standards, build genuine connections.

08:21 School bullying led to lasting facial scar.

Follow Jen:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jen.lander/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.butram/

Resources:
Landing Imperfect Website
https://landingimperfect.godaddysites.com/

Transcript

0:00

So when I was 12 years old, I was bitten the face when I was attacked by a dog. And it got so close to my eye and then on my neck, my carotid artery. So it was very, very fortunate that it didn't take my eye out and it didn't kill me. Welcome to this episode for those who don't know, my name is Jen and I'm a psychiatric nurse practitioner and I specialize in treating eating disorders. And today I want to talk, talk about a topic that. Is very common with this population and its negative body image. So this is a topic that really affects millions of people regardless of age, gender, or size. So I want to explore some. Roots. Of negative body image and a. We'll discuss some practical tips that can help you live a healthier life and have a healthier relationship with your body. Negative body images like this uninvited guests that can creep into our lives and wreak havoc on our self esteem and just our overall wellbeing. So I want to explore some things that can be the source of negative body image. And one of the things we could talk about is the media. Media. The media has. A lot of unrealistic beauty standards, there's airbrushed images. I mean, the media can significantly impact how we perceive our bodies. So the constant. Um, showing of these idolized images can just create this distorted perception of what is considered normal. Or even beautiful. So this can lead to us feeling inadequate or having, and struggling with feelings of shame. This is because we're comparing ourselves to unattainable standards. It's crucial that we're being mindful of the media's influence and that we're. We're seeking out diverse representations of what beauty truly is. The other thing that we could talk about is social comparison. We are living in a day and age where there is social media, all around us, and many of us are using social media on a daily basis. And it's easy to compare ourselves to other people. The platforms like Instagram and Tik TOK really do a good job of showcasing. Highlights of people's lives and it's often focusing on physical appearance, unfortunately. So this can create a distorted view of reality, and it just leads to feelings of envy and even self doubt and some people. I just want you to remember that social media is a highlight reel. It's not a true representation of someone's life. And I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with that. You know, people. People do want to put their best foot forward and they do want to show very positive things about their lives. It's natural that it is a highlight reel. But please be mindful of that. What you are seeing. And how you're feeling about, oh my gosh. Like, I feel this way and I'm struggling with negative body image, but it looks like they have it all together and they're doing great. Okay. Well, it's a 32nd reel most of the time, you know, there's a lot of things that are going on behind the camera that we don't know about and they could be struggling as well. So just be very mindful of that. And try focusing on building. Genuine connections on social media um, so societal pressures to conform to this specific body. Uh, IDEO can often contribute to body image issues. Um, there's cultural messages that often influence the NIS as a sign of success as a sign of beauty and, and health. So it's important to challenge those narrow beauty. Ideals and, and try to celebrate. The beauty of diversity. And then personal experiences so past traumas, um, this can be bullying or weight-based teasing. This can leave really lasting scars on her body image. So these experiences can shape our self perception and create a negative body image. It is essential to address the impact of these experiences. If it's anything that you have struggled with or gone through in your life, and you can do that through therapy or. Or finding other ways to support so that you can heal and rebuild a positive body image. And I want to emphasize that it's okay to struggle with body image. You're not alone. It's a very common human experience. The key is to develop tools and strategies to challenge those negative thoughts and to build a healthy relationship with your body. So some of the things that you can try are mindfulness, um, practices. This involves paying attention to the present moment without feelings of judgment. And it helps us to become aware of what our thoughts are and what our feelings are about our body without getting caught up in them. And by practicing mindfulness activities we can. Develop a greater sense of acceptance and appreciation for our bodies and make sure that we're practicing self-compassion too. So it's about treating yourself with kindness and understanding just as you would a friend. And this involves challenging those negative thoughts and replacing them with supportive messages. Um, and then we could talk about body neutrality. So shifting your focus from body positivity, there's a lot of messages, you know, like we need to focus on body positivity, body positivity, but sometimes that's unrealistic for a lot of people, especially when you're struggling with negative body image to go from negative body image, straight to positive. So focusing on body neutrality can be very helpful for some people. So instead of striving for that constant love and acceptance of your body, Body neutrality involves accepting your body as it is without judgment. It's about recognizing that your body is a vessel that allows you to experience life rather than solely defining your worth. And by focusing and practicing body neutrality. It helps you to focus on what your body can do, not what it looks like. Healthy lifestyle habits. So focusing on. Your overall wellbeing can help improve your body image. Make sure that you're engaging in regular, um, physical activity, get your blood flow in a little bit there and making sure it's something that you enjoy. Joyful movement, that's really key. And that's very important. Nourishing your body with balanced nutrition and getting enough sleep. All of those things are so essential for both your physical and your mental health. Remember that it's about taking care of your body, not punishing it. And I want to say that again, it is about taking care of your body. Not punching it. By prioritizing. A healthier lifestyle, you'll feel stronger and more energized and more confident in your body. So I know firsthand the challenges of body image. There were times when I felt trapped in this cycle of self criticism and dissatisfaction, So when I was 12 years old, I was bitten the face when I was attacked by a dog. And it got so close to my eye and then on my neck, my carotid artery. So it was very, very fortunate that it didn't take my eye out and it didn't kill me. Um, But I will say when I went to the ER, when I was taken to the ER, after this happened, I was in the ER room. And there was a healthcare worker there who kind of looked back. At me and just mouth the words like, oh my God. And I, that honestly crushed me. I just was like, oh my God, my face. Cause I hadn't seen myself at that point. And I was like, oh my God, like, what is this? Like, I'm so ugly. This is terrible. Like, it just, it was so upsetting to me. And then after the surgery had happened, I remember I was having a very hard time looking at myself in the mirror. And I had asked my dad if he could cover up some of the mirrors and he was so sweet and I can only imagine as a parent, how crushing that was for him to hear me say that. Um, and he was so sweet and he was so kind, and he was just telling me that, you know, I'm beautiful and it's okay. You know, so he just was trying to validate and support me the best that he could. But it still was very hard for me because I was very aware that people were staring at me while I was healing. And then this happened in the summertime. So when I went back to school as a seventh grader, there was a boy who. Was not a very nice boy. And he was like mimicking a dog bite, like being attacked, like he was putting his hands up to his face and going, ah, like, like someone was being like a dog was attacking him. Well, I was just walking down the hall and that was also very upsetting to me, you know, cause I'm going through my own emotional experience and just trying to recover from something that was very traumatic. Um, For me. So it's something that I don't love that I have a scar on my face, even as an almost 40 year old, when this happened to me when I was 12 years old. So it's not something that I love about myself or my body. And. It's something that I've had to practice over and over. It's not about body positivity and loving everything about my body, because I have a scar on my face that I do not love, and I don't think I'll ever love now. I'm very grateful that I'm alive. And I'm very grateful that I have both my eyes and I can see, you know, cause it could have been a lot worse. But it's more about me practicing body neutrality versus body positivity when it comes to my face and this the scar. Um, so, and I will say that, yes, I do have body neutrality. Now. I. I mean, obviously I have my days where it's still is upsetting or it still bothers me, but I just try to say, okay, well, you can see, you know, you're alive like I've had beautiful babies, like so many wonderful experiences in life, so just trying to be grateful and having some self compassion for. That experience in my life and focusing on neutrality, not positivity. So by time, by practicing and having support I've learned, and I know that anyone can learn to have a healthy relationship with their bodies. It's an ongoing journey, like I was saying, and there will be some ups and downs, but progress is possible. I want you to remember that you are worthy of love and acceptance just as you are. And if you are struggling with body image or an eating disorder, please reach out for help. There are resources available that can support you. I really, really appreciate you taking a lesson and until next time, please take good care of your body. Thank you so much for joining me on this episode of landing imperfect. I truly appreciate you being a part of this community and sharing this journey with me. If you do want to connect further, then don't hesitate to follow me on Instagram at Jen dot Lander. I would love to hear your thoughts, any questions or any stories that you want to share. So, DME there, I also have a website. It's a landing and perfect website where I share a blog post about my podcast, and then you can join my email list. I have a PDF that provides anxiety and stress management tools that you can. And use as well when you join my email list. So check it out. My website will be linked in my show notes. So don't hesitate to reach