ADHD Parenting: From Misunderstanding to Empathy

In this episode, Shauna and I dive deep into the complexities of parenting a child with ADHD, shedding light on the importance of empathy, understanding, and personal growth. Shauna shares her invaluable perspective on the need for self-care in showing up as the best for our children. We tackled the tough conversations around behavior, school systems, and the slow but rewarding process of cultivating positive change. 

Shauna is a single mom of 3 beautiful kids, a life coach for moms, and an IR Technologist.  She is an adventure seeker with hiking, traveling and exploring new places along with making memories with her family and friends.  She loves helping others and believes that working towards being our best selves, filling ourselves up first and leading by example is the light that starts that ripple effect to others, especially our kiddos. 

00:00 Excited to connect over parenting kids with ADHD.

05:32 Mother surprised and overwhelmed by comprehensive testing.

07:09 Questioning need for medication, advocating for alternatives.

10:21 Delay in addressing problems until they arise.

13:47 Seeking support to guide and protect children.

16:45 Importance of positive reinforcement for individuals with ADHD.

22:53 Lack of testing and understanding challenges family.

26:35 Parent struggles to understand child with ADHD.

 

Follow Shauna: www.igniteddecisions.com
Facebook: Shauna with Ignited Decisions
Instagram: ignited_decisions
Listen to her podcast- Release Your Inner Power at https://releaseyourinnerpowerpodcast.buzzsprout.com/share

Resources:
Landing Imperfect Website
https://landingimperfect.godaddysites.com/

Follow Bin Bargains:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61554547213119

Follow Jen:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jen.lander/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.butram/ 

Transcript

0:00

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They have Sam's club and target clothing brands high seriously could go on and on about how amazing the store is. And the owners, Jeff and Heather bedroom. They bust their butts to provide you guys with the best deals and experience in their store. Their staff is so welcoming and friendly. I'm telling you, you make your way over to Ben bargains located at seven 11 east main street, Geneva, Ohio. And you will know exactly what I'm talking about. Stay up to date with them on Facebook at Ben bargains, where they often share their deals and you can find their hours and Ben prices there as well. So happy shopping. Hi Shauna. How are you? I'm good. How are you? I'm excited to be here. Oh my gosh. I'm excited to have you. So for everyone, just so you know, we have met through a course that we took podcasting. And we were connecting through there, and then we finally just realized that we had more in common than just podcasting, it's ADHD. So, not Shauna personally, but her child, and me having ADHD and a child with ADHD, I was like, this is going to be a perfect conversation for us to share together. So would you mind sharing with us just kind of the start of it when you first realized that your kid had ADHD, what that looked like and kind of the steps that you had taken? Oh, yeah, sure. So, well, it's interesting because, he's my, I have three children and he's my first born. So when it's your first born, you don't know, you only know what you have, right? You know, what they have, their energy level, what they need, all of that stuff. And I remember, in the beginning when he, before five years old, people would just be like, oh my gosh, how do you do it? And I'm like, what are you talking about? what do you mean? And they're like, he is everywhere, all over the place. And, you're just on it. Like, you just do things with him and you're doing it. And I'm like. Well, yeah. And I'm like, being a new mom, isn't that how it is? Isn't the thing? And they're like, no, it's not. And I was always like, that was your kid, you know, whatever. This is mine. I'd always kind of like, not necessarily minimize it, but I would just be like, this is him. This is T. This is how it is. and so I would go through, I had multiple people tell that to me. And so it was just like, Oh, whatever. And then looking back now, Yeah. Like, there was days where I had to take him to the park two times a day, we would wake up in the morning, we'd get ready for the day, we'd go to the park for a little bit, and then we'd go back, and we would, do our time, it was me and him, I was a single mom with him, so, it was me and him a lot of the times, and on my days off when I wasn't working at the hospital, I would be with him all day long, and Sometimes he'd get more hyper as he would get tired, but he needed to get that out. And so there'd be afternoons where we're like, okay, what park do you want to go to now? Let's pick a park. Cause we're going somewhere. We're doing something, riding a bike or whatever. Cause you got to get your wiggles out. So let's do that. And I just thought that was the normal process. So I never really could see it at first because I just figured that was. That was the way that it was. And then, where it really kind of shed some light to me was in school. So when he started in school, he had a lot of anxiety at first about leaving me and being separated from me. So preschool drop offs were amazing. Yeah. There was a whole process to doing that. And he got, comfortable with the tea and great. And she really out how to do that. And t went on, it's hard for hi still, it's hard. And I'm He's got a lot of energy that's kind of his jam and then just like watching him do like homework and things and I noticed like how much of a struggle it was and I don't remember it being that much of a struggle And so I started asking questions around it and meeting with the teacher and really, Being curious about it and they kept kind of at first the school kept kind of minimizing it and being like it's just a boy like that's just how a boy is, you're not really gonna know until like basically 4th, And I'm like, why am I going to just wait until there's a thing like, yeah, for me personally want to know because what if, as a mom, what if I'm doing something to mess him up and I could be helping him, you know, if I'm trying to guide him and teach him to do this thing, but that's not his jam and I'm like trying to forcibly do this, I need to understand him fully if there is really something here. And so I took it upon myself to go to, a person to test him for, like, just, it was like the biggest test ever. But the way that they do it is really cool because they'll, play games and they'll, do drawings and they'll, do all this stuff. So it's not, it's not like you're sitting at a desk doing all this testing, right? And he was in third grade at the time. And it was a full day test, and at lunchtime I would pick him up, we'd go have lunch together, and then I'd take him back, and he'd finish the day. And then they give you this comprehensive, like, it tells you everything. It was like, I thought it was the coolest thing ever. Like, I mean, they broke down things to like, what they watch on TV, what they listen to, what is gonna, help them be the most successful in math and reading and all this. I mean, it was this whole comprehensive thing down to, him playing sports and all this stuff, what would benefit him and what could be detrimental to what he's doing, where his strengths are, where his weaknesses were. And I was just like, my mind was blown. I mean, yeah. Not to mention how overwhelming it was because I was like great like oh my gosh am I gonna have to like literally ball up everything and throw it out the window and we're just starting over from scratch here or am I going to you know I was like I just I literally felt like I didn't know what I was doing I'm like I feel like I have to change everything I feel like I'm doing everything wrong you I wasn't, but you know, I'm just like, you want your kid to be successful and all this stuff. So I started taking, sections of it and like diving into it a little bit more on how I can shift it. Cause I didn't want to have all this change. Cause he wasn't going to be excited about that. Right. And so I didn't want to have all of this change happen, but I tried to Gradually change things as we would go and until I wanted to get to the end thing, because at first sometimes, when people want quick fixes, they're like, well, there's medication for this. Okay. Yeah. Well, you know, sometimes medication isn't the answer. And, and I'm very much of a person even working in medicine where I'm like, but is medication, the answer here? Like, can we see what all options are first, instead of just like, but he needs to focus in school. So we need to just put them on medication. I was very much like, I wasn't sure about that. I wanted time and I wanted information and I wanted conversations before I'm putting my kid on, a medication and I'm like, if he's doing school, okay. And I got him tested on my own will, just so I could be a better mom to him and set him up for success. If there's not really an issue, then why would I need to do that? You know, so it was kind of like, I'm like the question maker, so I'm asking all the questions and having all these conversations and stuff, and it wasn't until, I think it was, I think it was the same year. I think I got him tested in the very, very beginning of third grade, and then by the end of third grade, there was a lot of things going on, and I was, it was almost like I did it right, like right in the nick of time, right? Because then they're telling me that he needs to to get tested and blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, that's already been done. Like I already did that. And I think they were a little frustrated with me because I didn't say anything to them, but at the same time, if he wasn't having any issues in the beginning. There's no reason for me to say anything. I don't need to tell them. Yeah. And if they didn't know how to handle that. Yeah. And I was going to bring this up because I think some teachers have a bigger caseload with a lot more students than others, which makes it even more challenging and difficult for them. So then when you have a child who has ADHD, I think there can sometimes naturally be a push to the parents, like, Hey, let's get them tested. Let's figure this out like you're saying. And then there's other times where it sounded like at first they were kind of stepping back and we're saying, Hey, let's just take our time with this. Do you feel like you were an island by yourself trying to navigate it and figure it all out You didn't have any support from the provider who was like, this is it and then it was kind of done Well, so the person because I went and got my testing on my own Um the person like offered like she's told me where I could go to get support for it It was a person that was Basically like a medication person that could give you medication and could talk about the things and I did, I ended up on my own like reaching out and trying to find resources because I very much like she gave me some but I was just like, um, you know, because I was questioning it and not really sure I was also trying to broaden out like there has to be more out here and surprisingly there was not like I was actually shocked at you give like this massive test and You give, like, a mini book, honestly, of, like, all the things that, you know, you can do, or that you, that might not be so beneficial, things like that, and then it's not, it's not like drop and go, it's like, yes, we can help you, so here's our couple avenues, but then, like, you're gonna need, like, Other things like support groups, or I don't know, just somebody to talk to, or, you know, maybe a behavioral therapist, or whatever, but it's like in the society norm, it's like, until there's a problem, we're not going to be really presenting you with solutions, and so because I took it upon myself to Get him tested. It was a little different. I think if I would have went there like here's the problem This is happening. Da da da da. I think maybe I it would have opened cracked open my world a little bit sooner But just because I chose to do it on my own. It was kind of like oh it was always like let's wait Let's wait Except until, until it was a thing, which I can kind of understand because it's kind of you don't want to put the cart before the horse in a way, but if he's diagnosed with something, there's going to be something that comes up that, you know, I may not understand or know how to navigate or, you know, fully get because maybe he can't even explain it. Yeah. I mean, being eight and nine years old, you know, he might not have the words that can explain what he's feeling or going through yet. And to have conversations at like an eight year old level, it's like, how do I say this in eight year old language? How do I navigate this in eight year old language? So it's like an actual constructive conversation. And, you know, you can't sit down with somebody like a kiddo that has ADHD and have a long conversation. You get two minutes. So how are you going to pack a punch, you know, two minutes of like, you got me dude? No. Yes. You know, you have to get really good at your communication skills. It is a thing. It's a thing like him with him. I mean, it, it got harder, the older he got, it was harder. So when they're younger, and I don't know if this is like, because of like them being little and not that they're like not cute when they're older, it's just different. It's different. When you were looking at them and they look like a small man, it's just, it's just different. But like when they're like little and they're cute, it's like some of the things kind of, I think go by the wayside because they're little kids and they're learning. Right. But then when they get older, then there's some things that's like, like, no, like when to, when they know better and when they don't know better. And that was a whole other thing for me too, is really understanding like scientifically the development behind somebody who has ADHD and with him. Like, he had ADHD, has ADHD, and he was Borderline Oppositional Defiant Disorder, which is pretty much Anything with an authoritative figure can really push back and like, yeah, it can be a real, it can be really bad or it could just be really frustrating. But like he was like towing the line. And I think I was more stressed about that because I didn't want him to tip to the really difficult side. And so I was really trying to concentrate on navigating that appropriately. And it totally goes on communication as well, because the second that my, Voice, tone, how I was saying something was in a, in a, like, demanding, authoritative state. Forget it. Like, forget it. He's done. Like, it could be 10 seconds and he's like, boop. And I'm just like, and then, you know, then I'm frustrated. Now he's frustrated. And now we're both frustrated. Now we're fighting about it. And like, you know, it just turns into this disaster, right? So it's like concentrating on that also with communicating through all of that. And then knowing you have two minutes. It's like a thing. And so when you say support and like having, having, um, you know, people or places to like help you, like I went to a behavioral therapy place, not because my kid had like behavioral issues, but because I needed to know how in the heck am I going to. Like pack a punch when I'm trying to guide him or teach him, you know, potential things that could end up being dangerous. Like when he's entering into his teenage years and like peer pressure and all this dumb stuff, that's like, you know, all around your kids that you don't want them to have anything to do with, but guess what? It's happening. You have to like, get those messages to them. And if they are. He just, you know, processes. Do do do do do do do do do. Like, I would love to have his brain, man. I, it would just be so cool to like, be able to process and do all of that stuff so quickly. But just like, knowing that you're planting in the seed in there and that it's actually in there, that's the thing. It's like, sometimes with him I would plant a seed and I have no idea it was like I was just taking a freaking spaghetti noodle and throwing it out there and like is it sticking I'm not even entirely sure and it would take like three years before I would get Oh, there it is. It did. Yeah, it's gosh years. So long game. It is not the quick like some kids are quick. With mine was not, was not the case. And it wasn't that it wasn't going in there and it wasn't, it wasn't that I wasn't guiding or teaching him. I was, but you do not get the feedback quickly. It's not, it's not quickly. And when you're in the process of doing things, for example, when he went into his teenage years, there was many times where it was really frustrating and there was a lot of things going on because of his impulsiveness. It was like off the charts like a lot of times he would react and then right after he'd be like, oh shoot Like that's not what I wanted to do or I shouldn't have done that or I shouldn't have said it or whatever You know, I mean and I would have to look I'd have to reframe how I was thinking about things So instead of looking at the things that he's doing wrong that he's not doing right that he's messing up on I would almost have to dismiss that and be like You just corrected yourself right there. Like you just said, Oh, I shouldn't have done that. And then I totally focused on celebrating the fact that he caught himself. And like, even though as a parent, sometimes you're like, but you did the thing, like you get so upset about the thing. But I had to really shift my mindset on the things that I wanted him to stop doing and start doing. Right? So, he caught himself, he checked himself, that I'm like, pouring into that, pouring into that, and then letting this go. And not, not like, Not like letting it go forever, but I needed to focus on that so then eventually I could talk to him about the thing he's not supposed to be doing. Yeah, and I love that you bring that up too because, like you're saying, a lot of A lot of times we can get caught up just, we're reactive and we're like, Oh, the bad thing, because we're problem solvers by nature. And we're trying to keep each other safe. And you know, these are your kids. So it's like, Oh, don't do that. Cause that's not safe, but for you to switch gears and it's so important with someone who has ADHD and, and a lot of people also we thrive off of. When we're trying to make a behavioral change or make any type of change, we either need, like, some kind of contingency, which can be not the best thing, it's like discipline, or we need some type of reward. So when you're rewarding him for noticing the thing, to him, that's like, oh, I need to do more of that, because that's resonating to him, so I think it's amazing that you're saying that. Because depending on and there's lots of different types of ADHD, honestly, so when you so it's not just all black and white for everyone. Oh, you have ADHD. So you look like this. No, people look differently. And and guys and girls, they look differently to with their ADHD. So we kind of have to navigate that and figure out what works best for our kids. So if you're picking up on he's responding to the rewards or me praising or whatever, it's like do more of that do more of that, because that really is what's going to change. Transcribed the behavior. So I think it's great that you picked up on that too. It's, it's interesting though because it's harder for the parent to do the shift. It is harder for the parent to do the shift. Like I think that was the biggest thing for me is like, but he's not supposed to do the thing. Okay. That is irrelevant at the moment, but for me to grasp that at first was so hard. It was so hard. And then eventually it was like more practicing for me. Right. And then you're right. Like I need to realize that if I'm practicing this much and I am changing this much and I'm shifting this much, it's going to be double for him. So I need to have more patience with it and, and remind myself like, yes, I have said it 40 times and I'm going to say it 40 more. And then I might get a little sliver of, yep, it's in there. And I might not. And so I might have to say it 40 more times. Like, it's just something that I. Accepted a long time ago, but I had to get past myself. I had to get past myself of how my expectation of what I think it is. That is not the reality of the situation between me and his relationship. That is not reality. And so I needed to, in order for us to better our relationship. So for me, it was important, if you have a good relationship with your kid, and you build that relationship with your kid, you know, again, like, not to be like his best friend, but it is important for him to feel like he can come to me, that he can talk to me, that he can say the things, because when stuff goes sideways, I don't want him You know, reaching out to people who knows, who knows to get his answers, you know, I want him to come to me and unfortunately with his school situation, he had a very, um, school was very hard for him because they were trying to put him in a box and he didn't fit in a box and it was, it was extremely damaging to him actually. And so we had to work through that together. And he got into the habit of lying, reactive lying, because he was always getting in trouble. And he felt that if he lied or, or tried to change it, that maybe he wouldn't get in trouble this time, you know? And he always felt like he was a bad kid, and he was told probably 20 times a day he was doing something wrong. And that he was bad, and all of that. And me, like, really sitting with that, and understanding what my child is hearing broke my freaking heart. Like, that is so, that sucks. That sucks. How do you expect a little to want to have the motivation and want to do good in their life when every person that they're looking to to be like, did I do it right? Is telling them they're doing it wrong. And that's the thing too with ADHD. So there's a deficiency in the chemicals in your brain. So dopamine is the deficiency. And what is dopamine? That's the, drive to want to do things. And when you're already deficient in it, for one, and it's hard to find motivation and things that you don't find interesting, and so when there's this expectation, like everyone else in school, your peers can respond in a different way than what you can. You're just trying to like catch up to everybody. So it is hard and it kills your confidence and your self esteem and all the things if people don't understand. Someone else's needs and the students needs or your kids needs or whatever the case is, you know So it is really hard on them and for you You and your other kids have not been diagnosed with adhd No. Nope. I'm pretty sure my daughter has it. Pretty sure my daughter has it. Just, because things are very similar. But, um, I have not tested her yet, no. Yeah. So, I think that's hard I have been diagnosed with ADHD and my son has been diagnosed with ADHD. My husband does not have ADHD and neither does my younger son. So, from a parenting stand inside of things, My husband, doesn't understand why my son's responding the way that he is sometimes. Like when you have to tell him 25, 000 times to do one thing and he's just not there, but yet he can spend hours on a video game. It's like, Hey, we told you to pick up your room and we told you all these things. We have to figure out how to parent him differently than we're parenting our other son because our other son will just do whatever we say, basically, so it is really hard for even him as a parent and me, I think I can get it, but it's, of course, it's still frustrating for me too. But I can also empathize with what he's going through and connect and then remind my husband of those things too. Is anyone else in your family, do you know, adult wise, that has had ADHD? Well, it's funny that you say that because nobody was ever really tested I don't want to say it wasn't a thing because that is not the truth. What I want to say is I don't think people were really aware of it or encouraged to go and find out or how it could help them or any of that stuff, right? And so I believe that my dad actually had it. I'm pretty sure that my son's dad actually has it, but neither of them had been, tested for it. Yeah. Um, but I like what you said about, like you saying that you had to check your husband a couple of times because of responses and things, because you understand, right? I think that has been the biggest challenge for me is that when we first had this, where he got diagnosed and then I'm trying to change things, my biggest thing was I need to understand how he operates. Period. Or this is not gonna go in a way that I want it to. And to fully understand that. But then, not only that. People surrounding me. So like my support system of my mom and my brother and other people in my family, like my cousins and what have you that are around, if they don't understand something and they don't understand how he's responding or they're not understanding what is happening, it was also my job to educate them why and how this was going on, right? Like, or let them know, Hey, yeah, you probably did tell him seven times to take out the garbage. And I guarantee you, if you go in and ask him right now, he's not going to remember. Right. So true, right? He's not going to remember and then he'll be like, Oh, I'll do it right now. You know, it's not like, and it's hard because some people that either don't have it or they don't have somebody around them that does have it, they don't fully understand. And it comes off as them being manipulative or they're trying to be bad or they're, you know, being disrespectful. And it's like, but they're not, that's the thing is you're lazy or they don't care. Yes. Like you have to. I don't fully understand that, and I felt that it was super important as a parent for me to do that, and it would actually be detrimental to my kid if I did not understand. It was more important for me to understand how he operates than my expectation of what he should be doing. Because those aren't going to line up. That's not going to line up. It's not, and it doesn't make sense. So am I going to make this harder for me? Cause parenting is hard anyway. Okay. Especially the time that we're in right now. Hello? This is like not, there's no, there's nothing that prepares you for it. I just talked with somebody earlier that was like, you guess and check. We're guessing and checking. This is what we're doing. It's true. It is true. And I just feel like it's hard anyway. So if you, fully really want to understand which is hard, right? Because now you got to take your expectation and we're gonna minimize this expectation right now and look at the bigger picture here and what we're really trying to accomplish. And you know, you can swim up the waterfall if you want, but it's going to take you like 10 years versus understanding. And taking the time and then trying to guide them appropriately in the way that they're going to hear you. Yeah. Will take you, let's say, four years, right? You're like cutting years off here of understanding if you take the time to do it. So when I first did that, I just like rabbit holed. I wanted to know all of the things. I wanted to know His specific diagnosis and what I need to do and how I need to parent, how he's going to hear me because he is going to be 16 one day. He is going to be out in the world where I can't protect him. I'm not going to be the person that's going to be able to stand there and advocate for him and protect him. And I have to teach him how he's going to do this. So he needs to hear me. Yeah, he needs to hear what I'm saying, you know? Yeah. And I think it's a struggle to, as a parent, this is something that I run into with my son is whenever we're talking about something for someone who has ADHD, they have a lot going on upstairs, you know, in their mind and everything's kind of making sense. Even if it's all over the place, it makes sense. But when you try to take it from your mind. and you're processing it and trying to articulate it, there is a gap there. And it's very hard for them to articulate feelings and emotions. so you're kind of out there all by yourself. Trying to figure out what your son is going through and what, for me, actually, I'll just say for me, trying to figure out what is he thinking, what is going on, because the, the actions and, how he's responding is not matching up. So you're kind of just really out there on an island, figuring this all out, trying to read anything you can communicate, talk with people, ask questions, cause it's really trying to figure all of that out, which is hard too. So with all of this going on and it is challenging and like you said, just being a parent in general is really challenging, but when you also are treating someone and not treating, I'm speaking from like a provider standpoint, but as a mother, like you're raising a child who, who is struggling with certain things in their life, how do you find time to separate that for yourself? How do you get that break? That you time to kind of recharge your battery. Yeah, he has been more of a teacher to me than I have, been to him, I feel. Like, I know that we have talked and had a conversation about asking your kiddos things and what they would say and how interesting that would be to see. I would really like to ask him, in a few years to see if I'm making it worse, but, He has definitely taught me more. And one of the things, is that to take care of myself because certain things that would happen with him, with his diagnosis and how he would handle things and with school and like all that, I would leave meetings crying. I would be crying at home. Like is this happening in other people's houses? Where are the people that are talking about this? You know, like, where are the people? Where are my people? You know, like, Yes, I so know what you're talking about. it's so much, because you want to love them, and you want to protect them, and you want to take care of them, and you want to do all of these things, and you feel like, Nothing is going in. You're like nothing. I'm literally doing nothing. And you're just so frustrated. And, and there came a time where I was like, this is crazy. I'm turning into a crazy person. I'm completely like, I'm not happy. I feel like ever I'm getting more irritated and then I my fuse is less with him when it needs more like I need to have a longer fuse. I need to be more patient. I need to have more understanding and I noticed that it was not happening. And so at first I would like take little breaks and things like that, and then I got to a point of now where like, I, I mean, the list is long, my friend, okay? Like, I, I go on girls trips, I go on adventures where there is no internet. So I'm literally off grid for three days, and you can't even text me to be like, I, can I have the soda or whatever. No, you cannot get a hold of me, it's, I'm out. I love that, yeah, it's so amazing. I will do that. I will go on hikes. I go on walks around my neighborhood. I work out a certain amount of times during the week. I go meet people for lunch and coffee. I reach out to people on text messages. If I get irritated, I have a code sentence that says I'm going to South America and nobody talks to me. Because I literally have to go somewhere for 10 minutes or I'm going to lose it. Like, I have so many things that I do because it is required for me to make sure that I am filling myself up first or I am not going to be the parent that he needs me to be to guide him in the direction that he needs to be in going in. Yeah, that's amazing. I think that is so vital and so important as a parent. For just as a parent in general, but like we're saying, um, raising a child who has ADHD. So anyone who is listening, if you have a child who has ADHD, as parents who are raising children with ADHD, we are giving you permission. We are telling you, take the time for yourself because you have to recharge your battery. You have to, it's so, Necessary and obviously you love your child and you're trying to pour into them as much as you can but pour into yourself You have to pour into yourself first So, please take care of yourself and take that time because you're only going to be able to give them more if you do that So thank you for sharing that. I really appreciate that shauna. Yeah, so I guess that's it so for your podcast let everyone know if they want to check your podcast out? Where can they find you? What's the name? Oh, sure. Yeah. My podcast is called release your inner power podcast. It's, it's kind of just what we're talking about actually. It is, it is for women to come together and connect and share their story and, you know, share their mom hood and share what they do as an individual to really bring out that inner power. And part of that is taking the time for yourself and making sure that you, you get that time to recharge so you can show up your best self. Everyone take a listen because it's great. It's an awesome podcast and social media. Any connections? Oh yes, I have my own coaching business. It's called Ignited Decisions. So on, Instagram, it's, ignited underscore decisions. And on Facebook, it's Shauna with Ignited Decisions. Okay, awesome. And I'll link those in the show notes too, so that you guys have it. All right. Well, thank you so much, Shauna. I've really enjoyed this time together and connecting, and I think it's really helpful to other people, just the relatability and to understand you're not alone and we're all kind of just making our way through imperfectly, right? Trying to figure it all out. So thank you so much for being on and, and I just really appreciate it. Oh, thank you for having me. It was fun. Thank you so much for joining me on this episode of landing imperfect. I truly appreciate you being a part of this community and sharing this journey with me. If you do want to connect further, then don't hesitate to follow me on Instagram at Jen dot Lander. I would love to hear your thoughts, any questions or any stories that you want to share. So, DME there, I also have a website. It's a landing and perfect website where I share a blog post about my podcast, and then you can join my email list. I have a PDF that provides anxiety and stress management tools that you can. And use as well when you join my email list. So check it out. My website will be linked in my show notes. So don't hesitate to reach out also this podcast is a personal project of mine. It's unrelated to the full-time work that I do for the company that I help treat eating disorders with. So while I do aim to provide professional and educational inspirational content here, It's important to understand that the podcast is not a substitute for professional treatment. So if you are someone that you know is struggling with any issues that I've discussed, please consider seeking the help by a qualified healthcare professional. And I'll be back with another episode next week. So stay tuned and continue to enjoy the journey of personal growth and empowerment. I can't wait to connect with you guys again and until then take care and remember that it's okay to embrace your imperfections. They make you the amazing. Amazing person that you are see you next week